So, today I had a low self-esteem moment. It came at 8:00 a.m. in the morning through email. I was treated as equal in contributions as someone that I 1.) don't look up to 2.) has a completely different skill set and 3.) quietly goes about trying to find ways that I'm imperfect for some unknown reason - except perhaps to be a "teacher's pet." But, this person is respected by the one person that can make things happen for them.
It really got me down as I looked at how much effort I'd put into this area of expertise and how little appreciation and acknowledgement come my way. I hear that behind the scenes everyone knows who is taking on the work, but they have a hard time telling me to my face.
Where does this leave me?
Well, with an attitude adjustment mid-day. (-:
First, I need to keep plugging forward - learning, doing, being. Keep contributing. Keep moving initiatives forward. Keep creating ideas and processes from blank sheets of paper. Keep my head up.
Secondly, check myself. When am I making people feel like dirt without knowing it? Who do I put down when I should be building up? How am I helping others fulfill their goals and use their talents?
I love the quote by Peter Drucker that talks about how leaders help make others weaknesses irrelevant by building on their strengths. What a wonderful concept to continually remember!
Anyway, this is a partial de-toxing of the negative feelings I had this morning.
On another note, someone that builds me up a little too much has introduced me to a firm that may need some help in my primary area of expertise (e-learning/performance support/knowledge management). Pretty cool. It will at least be an interesting conversation. I enjoy being able to help people generate ideas in the area of learning even if there is no payment. And, sometimes especially if there is no payment - then there is no pressure. (-:
Thanks for listening. Must get ready for my discussion.
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